Thermochromic table by Jay Watson
imagine banging someone on that table
imagine being home alone and seeing imprints on that table
Imagine having a friend sit at that table for a long while, but when they get up there’s no imprints at all.
What if you got up after trying to console a crying friend, and found that you had no imprints… and they were crying because they missed you?
Oh my fucking god???
What the fuck is wrong with you people I hate you all
You bump into a man on the subway wearing a trenchcoat. You apologize and he responds “Its alright. We’re only human. All of us. All of us here are human. Yep. Very human. I’m probably the most human here! You betcha.” and then the trenchcoat falls and the figure collapses and roughly 1000 salamanders scatter around the train
Remember when there was a 7 mile spanking machine on spongebob and no one said anything about it ever
bring me the booty
imagine if girls used the same style of joke to degrade men like “cool story bro now go chop some lumber”GO CHOP SOME LUMBER
"what r u doing out of the garage go fix my car"
"Don’t you have something to fix somewhere."
battle of the century
I hate everyone
WHY AM I LAUGHING SO HARD WHY IS MY SENSE OF HUMOR THIS TERRIBLE
my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
but he’s like, I’m lactose intolerant